My wife refuses to let my son see his sister (and visa versa) with their grandparents supervising
From the moment my wife had disappeared and taken our daughter, the one thing which mattered most to me was making sure both my children could see each other. Of course I wanted my wife back as well, I wanted our daughter back, as I love them both and was missing them dearly, but I was trying to take things slowly. Not try to force anything upon my wife.
When I was issued with the a Family Court order for residence, again my main concern was that my son and daughter were allowed to see each other. Yet nobody seemed to be bothered about this. My wife had stopped speaking to me, and I had to now go through her solicitor to ask the simplest of questions.
Even my solicitor seemed to be avoiding the distress I was imposing regarding the contact between siblings. It was only when our court dates for the hearing were put back I really got annoyed; because CAFCASS had not been informed. Now someone tell me where the blame lies in this? The Court knew about it, The Solicitors new about it, but CAFCASS – the Courts advisory service..?
I have to admit, I sort of had an argument with my solicitor.
I tried to explain this was ridiculous and there was no reason at all to stop my children seeing each other. I did not have to be there, they could be supervised by grandparents, in a place where my wife decided. What was the problem of this? I also requested this be sent directly to her solicitor so we had it in writing. As I was sure being in writing, her solicitor would almost convince her to agree.
Well Friday just gone, I had a reply. Clearly stating my wife refuses to let my son see his sister (and visa versa) with their grandparents supervising.
Now I have mixed feelings about this. What reasons would any decent mother have to refuse siblings from seeing each other? What gives her the right to dictate who supervises, what gives her the right to say who our daughter can see and who she cant? Grandparents have always been there for both of my children and there has never been any cause for concern before – so why now? It makes me so angry; it really makes me angry nobody is considering the children. Nobody is putting their welfare first. Yet everything about Family Court is supposed to be there for the children and supposed to be putting their interests first.
The United Nations Convention On The Rights Of The Child states:
- “the child should be brought up in the spirit of peace, dignity, tolerance, freedom, equality and solidarity”
- “the right to know and be cared for by his or her parents”
- ”the right of the child to preserve his or her identity, including nationality, name and family relations”
- “respect the right of the child who is separated from one or both parents to maintain personal relations and direct contact with both parents on a regular basis, except if it is contrary to the child’s best interests.”
- “both parents have common responsibilities for the upbringing and development of the child. Parents have the primary responsibility for the upbringing and development of the child. The best interests of the child will be their primary concern.”
- “protect the child from exploitation”
- “States parties agree that the education of the child shall be directed to the development of respect for the child’s parents”
- “provide necessary support for the child and for those who have the care of the child”
So far, nobody has taken or looks like they will take any of this into consideration. From the first moment the Family Court got involved, they should be thinking of the children, putting the children first. Not listening to accusations which have no evidence to support them.
Where is the “Equality”, “the right to preserve family relations”?
I find myself both angry and sort of happy (if that makes any sense)
Yes I am angry that my wife is stopping anyone from seeing our daughter. To me this makes no sense at all, and there is no valid reasons to be doing this. Yet nobody seems to listen. But on the other hand, I find myself hoping and praying the Family Court and CAFCASS will see how she is manipulating her status and being over possessive regarding our daughter. The fact Emma is not allowed to see her brother, grandparents, cousins, aunts, uncles and her own father is clearly wrong.
And what matters most is “nobody is asking her why?” Why she will not allow it, what are her reasons? Is she really acting in the best interests of Emma?
I personally do not think so.